How we emotionally cheat on our partners and how to stop it!

I was listening to a relationship show that now comes on a radio one station in my hometown of baltimore and i found that the brother made some good points about emotional cheating that i believe in.

First of all what is emotional cheating?

Emotional cheating is when you are sharing intimacy or close encounters in an inapropriate way with anyone other than the one you are presently in a relationship with.

Emotional cheating can occur with a person of the opposite sex (or same sex if you swing that way) but it can also occur with friends, family even blog members.

Lets get into more detail.

This is the three signs that you might be cheating on your lover or present partner emotionally:

#1: You May Be Emotionally Cheating When You Are Sharing Private Secrets About Your Mate With Others:

This is a no no that women often do more than men.

It's become so normal now for some that many of us dont even percieve it as wrong anymore.

It's just a given.

This can be damaging for many reasons.

First of all by blabbing out the secrets of your partner to others you lose a connection with the one you are with.

Its kind of like a betrayal because the person told you these details with the intent that you probably wouldnt tell others the way you are doing.

I can understand why women do this more than men (even though many men also give out their partners secrets to excess) because the way a woman shows her love and affection is through sharing herself with others.

So if a woman shares very intimate details about her life with others, thats like telling that woman or man or whatever that they are important to her and that they have their trust.

This is a good thing.

But it shouldnt be done to disclose major secrets about your mate because even though they dont know, you know.

And that takes away some of the intimacy (or close feelings) from the relationship because some people actually feel guilty about that later and a friend (or at least someone you thought was a friend) might actually try to take your spouse as a result of the information you told them (thats another story).

Or if you are physically attracted to the one you are telling your secrets with, this may bring you closer to that person thus upping the chances for infidelity and cheating.

#2: You May Be Emtotionally Cheating When You Have Sexual Tension With The Ones You Call Your Friends:

I would presume this happens often because i've heard somewhere that the friends that we have of the opposite sex are often people we are attracted to.

However even if you are attracted to a friend that you have or flurt often with this person, that doesnt mean necessarily that you might have some sexual tension for that person (however it doesnt mean that you dont have it).

The main question here is, what is sexual tension?

I guess sexual tension could be anything involving flirting, touching, kissing, or saying things that might only be reserved for you in a partner.

This could cover a variety of different things but typically the person knows that they may be flirting too much when they fanatsize about this person in a sexual manner or think about them more than their partner (i don't know).

#3: You May Be Emotionally Cheating When You Are Sharing More Intimate Feelings With Your Friends, Family Etc. Then With Your Partner:

This is a tough one again because many of us often do it wihout seeing the damage in it.

We may go to our mothers or fathers, sisters or brothers, fellow blog members or close friends first before we tell our partners how we feel (whether its good news or whatever).

This might not necessarily break a relationship but ideally you should be able to go to your partner and tell them about anything thats bothering you or tell them first if you have good news of some sort.

If you go to others first that cuts off a moment of sincere closeness and intimacy that you can have with your partner.

If you go to them after you've already shared this important information with others first then it's like they are getting sloppy seconds and the ordeal might not be as intimate.

If you can't go to your mate about something first before you go to others then you need to find out why you cant do that.

So i guess the main way you stop this is by doing the opposite of all three.

Or you can use the person as a disposable toy and throw them away whenever you feel like it lol.

That seems to be the case with so many now.