Love Quiz: The Warning Signs of Relationship Problems

Got this quiz from Barbara De Angelis's "Making Love Work" home coure for relationship assessments.

This quiz is designed to help you detect some of the warning signs that may indicate you have some problem in your relationship that need attention. If you're single, take the most recent or most serious relationship you have had. Answer as honestly as you can. Remember: The first step toward changing your love life is facing what isnt working.

Grade yourself on each question according to how frequently these statements apply to you.

Very Often ...5 points
Often ...3 points
Seldom ...1 points
Never ...0 points

Answer as honestly as you can. You may not like admitting some of this to yourself, but facing it is the first step toward changing it. And remember, you have a much better chance of staying in love by being aware of the warning signs that you do by ignoring them.

1) You are critical of your partner out loud or to yourself.

2) You feel a drive to do things without your partner, a craving for your own space.

3) You find yourself looking at or being attarcted to other member of the opposite sex.

4) You avoid having sex or intimacy with your partner, you dont seem to find the time or be in the right mood (headache, tired, etc.)

5) You find yourself unable to forgive certain things your partner has done in the course of the relationship, and still feel angry or upset when you think of these things.

6) You stay home a lot with your partner because neither of you makes plans for social activities out together.

7) You feel a nostalgia for the past, remembering the begining of your relationship as ahappier time, or remembering other relationships prior to this one as being more exciting.

8) You spend most of your time with friends or in activities that do not involve your partner.

9) You do not share your feelings or observations with your partner because you feel he or she wont understand.

10) You have some form of addiction that causes you to become numb to your feelings: drinking alcohol, using drugs or tranqualizers, overeating etc.

11) You and your partner dont take the initative to plan or spend romantic time together.

12) If you have children, you and your partner spend most alone talking about the children. When you are together as a family, you pay more attention to te children than you do to each other.

13) You have a best friend with whom you share important feelings that you dont share with your partner. You feel closer to this person in many ways than you do to your partner, and feel he or she understands you in ways your partner does not.

14) You tune out what your partner says when he or she is talking to you, only half listening to what he or she is saying.

15) You avoid being alone with your partner by working late at night, bringing work home, or overscheduling yourself so you never seem to have time for each other.

16) You are neglecting your appearance; you are overweight; you pay little attention to dressing in an attarctive way way for your partner, or you neglect your personal hygeine.

17) You criticize your partner to friends or family and complain about the relationship.

18) You compare your partner unfavorably with other people; the others appear more attractive, more witty, more sensitive etc.

19) You neglect to give complements and other expressions of appreciation to your partner.

20) You fantasize sexually about other people when you are in or out of bed.


Now total up your points


0-30 points: Your relationship is in good shape

31-50 points: Your relationship is in the begining stage of trouble

51-70 points: Pay attention: Your realtionship is in trouble

71-100 points: EMERGENCY! Your relationship is in crisis and needs immediate attention.