How to stop being jealous and stop others from being jealous

what causes jealousy?

when people have something that we wish we had ourselves.

what can we do about it?

focus on what we have of value that the other person may not have.

ex. you're jealous of a celebrity, you have privacy.

you can go anywhere do anything and nobody will care.

you may be more intelligent, whatever.

why do we get jealous when our partner likes something about somebody else (or so it seems)?

because we wish we had that attention that the other person is getting.

what are some examples?

looks, sparkling personality, money, power, status, nice body, better sex etc.

how do you cure this type of jealousy?

let the person know in a relaxed and re-assuring way that the thing they are jealous of in this other person means nothing to you.

and if you can, point out a negative of having that characteristic to begin with.

ex. so if the person has a better body than your mate, talk about how shallow they are to spend so much time on themselves.

if the person has a lot of money, point out how the person has all this money but is still unhappy.

if the person is better in bed then talk to them about what they can do to turn you on and how they can work on it themselves (i'm stretching with this one).

in other words make the characteristic they are jealous of a source of pity rather than a source of envy.

Note: when talking to the one you're presently with, it's not appropriate to harp on their good qualities (telling them how great they are in other areas) because they aren't threatened by that.

they are threatened by whatever this guy has that they don't have.

so address that issue.

normally this technique works swiftly and automatically. But for those who are extra jealous you might want to use a different approach.

when people are jealous to the point where they don't even want you to go outside, then they are acting this way because they believe that you are too good for them and it's only a matter of time before you realize it yourself.

when they feel this way, the best thing to do is to flip the script, get jealous about everything she does and everyone she associates with.

when you do this you are giving her the thing she is missing most and that's power.

you give her some of it back when you make a scene over her.

if this problem continues (which it won't but in that extreemely rare case that it does) reemploy the same technique, but if the person is still acting crazy you might want to get some therapy for the both of you or let it go

stop settling for less in your relationships. you have the power to change your partner for the better. if you have an open mind don't be afraid to click here to learn more.